What a girl wants? (not a fiction)

Waving back at her friend, she began to briskly walk up to the metro station. Walking always made her happy. She loved to observe her surroundings, the street, trees, flowers, houses, busy city life and people too sometimes.

Suddenly her eyes fell on a moving car with guys in it on the opposite side if the one way road. They were looking at her. Ignoring, she continued to walk. It was all fine until she found the same car to be following her around.

Subtly, she kept an eye on the movements of the car, while continuing to walk. She dialed up her sister to tell her about this episode. All of a sudden, the car sped up and disappeared, only to reappear very close to her through an intersection on the road, but they missed coming face to face with her by a second.

Alarmed, she hurried her steps now for she knew the car planned to come from up front that would have brought it right next to her. So she rushed and reached her destination just in time when they nearly passed her on the street.

****

She was walking towards the bus stop with three of her friends. It was all pleasant. College, friends, gossip, cribbing and happiness, plus a healthy walk. 

Suddenly, something solid hit one of her jeans clad leg. Screaming she turned around to find a speeding car not fast enough to hide a curly haired guy, winking after having successfully thrown eggs at them in the name of a festival. 

It was a busy and crowded route with people of all age around but the guy didn’t bother anyone else and drove away with a smug expression. The spot where the egg had hit her had turned into a well sized purple hued wound that had hurt for days.

****

It was 45 degrees with humidity at all time high, it seemed. She had a class in two hours which meant, more battles with the heat. “Can’t I just go in a dress?” She asked herself.
“Sure honey if you could stand lecherous stares?” Fired her conscious. “Suffocation it is!” she replied even before her mind could stop smirking.

****

“I can never take the local bus. The crowd just freaks me out. They look at you as if they haven’t seen a woman,” said one girl.

“Yeah, same with metro, when you walk down from general side of the platform to that of ladies’. Though the crowd is sometimes better, it does feel like a staring competition, added another.

“Oh and how about the auto ride, the damn auto wala can’t ever keep his eyes on the road.”

“And when you walk out of some place, all happy and feeling sophisticated and then someone passes a lewd comment?”

“Oh yeaaah,” they all replied in unison.

****

She was doing good in life and in her career. Recognition, success and happiness came her way. It was a good day that day until she reached home to be greeted by some relatives and family friends. Asking her what she was doing and getting quite blown away because prejudice, set the tone for the night.

After a while, the kids went to other room to enjoy a chit chat. In between came a news on the television, the grown up guy from the lot decided to test her knowledge out of everyone else sitting there including other guys. She answered successfully, while he simply said,”that was an easy one.”

****

My point being, she was minding her business, was well dressed and trying to live her life happily just like men, but it didn’t set right with some delinquents who take pleasure in intimidating, bothering, torturing or condescending women or far worse in a lot of cases. Something is seriously wrong with them for they can’t see a woman as a human.

While many men are not like the ones I described above and believe me we are so glad and thankful for that. We can’t express it in words.

But what I’m trying to say here is we as a country go on and on, talking about development all the time when in reality we haven’t even been able to keep our women safe. I’m not even talking about advance stages of feminism like equal pay etc. This is basic!

My mom literally can’t relax until I’m back and I feel her pain. If I ever have a daughter in this society,  I would perennially lose sleep.

But I also believe that only bashing authorities in every situation isn’t the solution though it is needed in this one because the grown up men who commit these crimes can’t be made to think right in one day so just by saying “change your perspective” isn’t going to do anything.

A strict judiciary, law and order with focus on better security is the need of the hour to prevent crimes against women. Perhaps then it would also be easier for the government to focus on their emancipation.

So yes in this situation, we should keep asking the government as to whatever on earth are they “actually” doing to safeguard women?

But otherwise at a personal level, as was the reason I wrote this article, we can initiate a change by teaching our little boys at homes and around to respect women and see them like a human being just like a man. Only then would it reach grassroot level. Authorities can only do so much but we have to have some responsibility too. Don’t you agree? 

So next time you’re trying to be sympathetic to this cause, I request you to also press on these two solutions because greater the pressure on the government the faster they’d act. And the other thing, we have to do it ourselves only.


  

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61 thoughts on “What a girl wants? (not a fiction)

  1. You’re right.. It’s not a Fiction.. This is something that hurts, increases my heart beats..Makes me feel so uncomfortable..😟.. And talking about teaching our little boys, I’ve seen few guys treating their sisters like best fd, loving her protecting her, but same time talking shit about other girls, why? Coz she’s not their sister.. Such guys leave values taught by their parents at home when they walk out..
    There is literally no day, where you dont hear about something bad..
    Fds, teachers, neighbours, uncles, cousins .. Feels so gross after hearing that.. And they say about clothes provoking men, then gals of age 10, teens, women, wearing top, sari, burkha, all of them are facing problems today..
    You’re right, teach your child to respect Humans..
    If not, punishment should be so strict and immediate that sets an example for others..

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Hey there, thank for your patience for reading this long post and then appreciating the intention too.
      You are so right, double standards of guys who treat only their kins right and not others are horrible. Just too horrible.
      I know what you’re feeling, it’s helplessness, something we feel everyday that is why both you and I are asking people like us to teach the little ones.

      Liked by 2 people

  2. That is so damn true..
    Girls basically want not to be judged and predjudiced..All they want is to be recognized with their talent and not because of their sex..
    Hope the society will someday change its mindset and the girls will be free to fly the way we men are..
    Stay blessed..Damn true post!..Heard about a lot of this from my female friends and sisters..👌🏻

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you Mayank for understanding and appreciating the intention behind this post.
      I feel weird because on one hand we talk about getting equal pay like that of men and all the advance stages of feminism when in reality, most women feel unsafe here and have to take so many measures just to stay safe! And then there are other issues, all coming down to the need of changing perspectives and developing a strict law and order.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Unfortunately a bitter truth of the society,we are claiming our nation as a rapidly developing one but this is the one issue that remains standstill although women have already topped in every sector equally as men but still society judge them on the basis of unrealistic things for instance her clothes.Only a strict judicial system & better education can help to remove these acts.
    Even fiction is better than reality.
    Take care,stay blessed!!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I agree with everything you wrote and especially about how fiction is better than reality.
      I hope it happens the solutions you provided, they are need of the hour. At our personal level though, we can start by teaching little boys to respect a woman as a human being.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. This is a serious concern and the teaching should came from home it self by parents i guess like i am also not a white collar man but atleast we should know & practice to maintain a dignity and let women feel free from this hideous acts. 🙂

        Liked by 2 people

      2. Yes yes you’re absolutely right. Doesn’t matter what our background, occupation, etc, is, the parents should teach their kids these values alongside the age old kinds of stay kind, polite etc. It’s for their own good and then a boost at macro level.

        Liked by 1 person

  4. A rather difficult topic to say the least, yet you have brought it to light perfectly. I am sorry to hear you have to go through such incidents. I used to never be safe as I was growing up in Paris, a lot of the incidents you describe have happened to me in different shades of grey. It is somewhat very different here in the UK when it comes to safety. I don’t see any simple solution to such complex ingrained problems but indeed it starts with each and one of us, to take responsibility for ourselves and our actions.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hi Belle, how are you doing? I’m sorry too that you had to go through them too. Even in Paris? Seriously?
      Yes, that’s true they are indeed ingrained problems and require a holistic approach to wipe them off our society but nobody does anything much in this regard which is the main problem.
      I wrote this for the same purpose as you wrote very rightly, to make ourselves more responsible in this regard because it has to start somewhere.
      Ps. I sure hope me and you as well as all the ladies, get rid of these problems and be able to live happily someday!

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Hello Twinklingwords, I am discovering how blogging works hehe. I can’t thank you enough for your award nomination. Words fail to express my gratitude. I have been discovering beautiful blogs thanks to you, you surely are a star ❤ I was pretty much writing in my own corner of the world before I met you here, true blogging is lovely ❤
    What about you? how are you doing? I hope you are ok, I suspect writing this post hasn’t been the easiest thing to do but I do hope it helps you healing and give you hope for better days.
    Definitely, and far too many times too. It never felt safe growing up there, I remember as a teenager dressing with military outfits to stay safe. It is one of the many reasons I love it here in the UK. I suppose I don’t necessarily like writing about these sorts of things but I am so glad there are people like you who do. It is ever so important to raise people’s awareness.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Haha Belle, you’re too kind😄, it’s your fabulous work that is getting you all the attention and applause that it well deserved. You don’t have to thank me Belle😀 But yes, interactions make it a much much better experience, so once again thank you too for that😄
      I’m gud too. I was down with fever😭 but all good now😁 you’re so right dear Belle, it wasn’t easy writing it. You would have felt uneasy and uncomfortable reading it which is what I felt writing it. I have edited it ten times too!
      I have always been a closed person but ever since Instagram and blogging, I’m opening some part of my heart out to the world and I’m sure it’s the same deal with you, is it?
      So I needed to write and make a point here after all they say a pen is mightier than a sword (well keyboard in this case!) So that is why I had to give it a try!
      Yes it helped and I hope it would make some change and definitely wish for happy days for you, me and every other woman.
      It makes me so sad to hear that you’d have to dress up in military outfits to stay safe. I guess we as a race still have to do a lot to make women safe and better around the globe. It’s alright, you don’t have to write it, this piece of information is enough for me to judge your plight. I’m glad things improved for you😄
      PS. How’s it going with our little doll and your poem?

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Thank you so much on my blog Twinklingwords, you are ever so kind. But you did indeed show me the way to blogging, that I am sure of ❤
        I am sorry to hear you have been poorly, I am a little poorly today also but hope to be back and running tomorrow.
        It is indeed a difficult read, but it only means that you wrote it in such beautiful ways that it truly touches the reader. It does all the more so if the reader has lived similar moments in their lives too. It too made me sad to read those incidents you have been experiencing and I too wish you and women better times.
        There is this quote I love from Nelson Mandela “A good head and good heart are always a formidable combination. But when you add to that a literate tongue or pen, then you have something very special.” It seems that you are there indeed only with a keyboard :0)
        It takes a lot of courage for one to write the kind of posts you just wrote and I admire you for it from the bottom of my heart. Indeed the whole point of my blog is to live vulnerably a story at a time, to be true to myself as much as I can. Yet certain stories are too raw for me to share and they tend to remain locked on my laptop or notebook. I blame it on the writer block but really I am always writing. Is that similar for you?
        Thank you so much for asking, the poem has now a photograph and I am just being rather lazy or overwhelmed by my second blog award lol but Skya is patiently waiting 😉
        I dare not ask you about Emma as I do not wish to pressurise you in any way, but I will be ever curious to know if/when she happens to speak to you in any ways one of these days ❤

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Haha Belle, thank you in that case☺
        Sorry to hear you’re not well either, how are you now? Hope you’re well now😃
        Thank you so much for appreciating the way I have written it. I can’t tell you how much it means,
        I mean I’m speechless, what you said with the Nelson Mandela quote, OMG, you’re so kind❤ thank you so much. Well you are there too Belle, indeed you are, but I know you’d be too modest to bring yourself to accept that!😄😄
        Such words give you so much happiness which not many things can bring. Thank you, truly ❤ Also thank you for wishing the best for us. ❤❤
        There are some stories I so wish to share but I can’t just like you, they are too close to me, and a guarded person like me and perhaps like you too can’t put herself at such vulnerability. May be someday we would share them, may be not but they would stay in our notebooks or phone or laptop, or in our minds. I have that with feelings too, there is so much I want to share but I just can’t, I feel like I’m bothering the other person so I don’t share. I try to share them here but only in pieces.
        Oh yeah, I realised that, congratulations Belle, looks like other people too can see how awesome you are😁
        Lol like Skya, Emma is patiently waiting too, rather she is a little afraid as the world is too harsh for her pure soul. But she will come soon. No, you didn’t pressurise me Belle. Emma is rather glad there are people who care about her❤
        Haha okay take your time with your poem then, art and literature can’t be rushed anyway yo😄

        Liked by 1 person

  6. Wow V, you gave us goosebumps every time it sunk in that all this is for real. Very expressively written, and I am a complete fan of your narratives now. You wrote it so well, that change has to come from within us, the state can only do it’s bit to an extent. Bottom up approaches have to begin from home, wherein women are treated no differently from men. I love the fact that in our home, my mum and dad sit at the head of dining table on alternative days since I was a small kid. If such small nuances are inculcated among young impressionable minds early on, a gradual societal change isn’t impossible. One can only wish for more quality education, more grassroot awareness and more stringent monitoring mechanisms which hold potential to bring about a reversal in our attitudes and thought processes.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Aishwarya, hey! Thank you so much for reading it with so much heart and sensitivity. And yes, thank you for all the kind words for my writing too😃😄 means a lot, coming from you.
      How nice of your parents to have been following a healthy approach to a relationship, you know people these days would call it gender equality that you have at your place but in my opinion (humanitarian) it comes across as two people with a good heart, who treat everyone with respect including their family members.
      Exactly you’re right, when your conduct is ethical, humanitarian, respectable and kind around impressionable minds, it does groom the kids right. So definitely, if you set and follow right examples, your kids will learn the same which will gradually bring a macro level change.
      Yes, you’re right, other than that one can only wish better mechanisms and raise voice against foul ones working for this cause to bring about a change and better days.

      Liked by 1 person

  7. You are very welcome Twinklingwords, I am only stating the truth and indeed I am truly the modest kind hehe. We seem to discover each day some more similarities. Similarly, some of my stories/feelings are locked tight in notebooks; I simply do not feel ready to share them; they could be too much for the readers, put them off…you name it, I can find hundreds of reasons. For me the most important is to not feel forced, the part of my story that wants to be shared will let me know when it is ready if you see what I mean. I am so glad to hear Emma is in touch with you, that is the most important bit. Emma and Skya can play together, Skya is a pure soul also, I am sure they’ll have a great time together ❤
    P.S: Sorry I couldn't find a link to reply directly to your latest comment

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh yes, I can’t tell how happy it had made me to find a person who shares my habits! Lol it’s hard to find things like this in real life.
      And yes, I know what you mean there, it sort of crops up in my mind when a story is ready to be shared. I can’t just can’t force myself to write especially those super short fictions, so I know what you mean!
      Haha Yess! Skya is definitely pure and kind hearted just like her creator and yes who knows may be one day Emma and Skya become best of the friends! Keep dreaming is what we always tell each other anyway 😄😄
      And regarding your direct comment, no problem!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Me too, I am ever so grateful we got to meet her and can’t wait to share more of our similarities here, Instagram….Let’s indeed keep dreaming ❤ It isn't always easy but it certainly is well worth it ❤

        Liked by 1 person

  8. You go girl !! Just stopped here for a while after reading that line “city of stars .. ” because it’s my favourite song but this post moved me from within. It really feels good after seeing that someone is using her writing skills in an exceptional way. And yes, this is not fiction and that shows the bitter truth of a so called modern society !! More power to you 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hey thank you so much for stopping by and leaving such an encouraging and kind comment. Yes, absolutely bitter truth, they act all modern but still have worse than caveman tendencies.
      Your comment has made me so happy, thank you once again. And yes finally another person who noticed this song, I love it too 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

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